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How NOT To Get Ready In The Morning

Roomie went away for Easter Weekend.

Once again, I’m dog wrangler and now puppy wrangler.

Something new has been added.

As the dogs are not yet fully comfortable with the puppy (and for everyone’s protection) they are bivouacked downstairs, and the puppy (in her carrier) is quartered upstairs.

Usually on the roommate’s bed, with the crate door open (!)  (Not that the puppy is spoiled, or anything…)

SO, in an effort to be consistent (sigh).

Each night since Friday has been a little different, but she has mostly slept through the night, and alerts me if she needs to use the facilities. (She is paper trained and has one in the communal bath).  A good dog, but still a puppy. (3 months!)

The most difficult time is the shower.  The puppy likes to join the queen roommate in her shower, but with my physical disabilities, I fear I might step on her or slip.

So Lola has been relegated to her crate.  Which she deems to be medieval torture, and screams and cries bloody murder!  I’m certain the neighbors think I’m Michael Vick!

Showers have been quick.

Then, while getting dressed, Lola wants to steal socks and underwear, and play biting games with fingers and other flesh.  OW!

SO, I took one of her toys from her crate – Flatty Fox – an unstuffed toy with squeakers at helm and stern, and played tug-of-war while getting dressed.  Better than using my shorts!

Nope.  She’s not spoiled.

Small Arms Review

Nope.  Not the periodical.

Some years ago, I met a guy who became a friend.  He remains so.  At the time, he was actively participating in owning and shooting legal machine guns and such, and was pals with ‘famous’ folks in that firearms community, including a gentleman who at the time was the ‘small arms editor’ for a journal designated for ‘the armchair adventurer’.

And I was anxious to meet him.  At the time, I think I was carrying a borrowed Ruger .357 (thanks, again, Dave!).  I had the perspective of both the poor and the gun poor of such individuals.  Star-struck?  Shiny-brass struck?

I was having a conversation with my sister, who, while she knows I’m a gun guy, has no interest in such things.  And I mentioned this gun writer, Id-ing him as ‘the small arms editor of…”

And, my sister, who has similar (twisted) sense of humor to mine, responded,

Do they have any editors with regular-sized arms?

Of course, we both broke up laughing as we pictured ‘Willie the Penguin Boy’ of sideshow fame!

penguinYes, I should be gassed.

This concludes the politically-incorrect humor portion of our program.

The You Tube Files – Missing TV and Guffaws

Being a child of TV/movies, I’m always looking for things referencia obscura for my daily You Tube posting.  You Tube is terrific, because almost every snippet or clip I desire seems to be there.

I DID say almost…

There was a one-season-wonder, a police who-done-it in 1995, starring Karen Sillas, called Under Suspicion.  (The TV show, NOT the films.)

It was good stuff.  Sadly.  it’s not available on VHS or DVD – and You Tube only has a couple short segments featuring some guest star I don’t care about.

But, perhaps one day…

However, I did remember something else that had slipped through the cracks.  Another not-straight-to DVD wonder.

It Came From Hollywood.  If you like MST3K, you’ll LOVE IT!

Apparently, there were so many obscure clips in it they could no longer get rights to, it was too expensive to re-release on DVD.  So I held on to a VHS player in hopes of one day buying the one VHS copy that used to be available on Amazon.  (It’s also available on Laserdisc!  Woo-Hoo!)

But, in my travels, I found it in it’s entirety on You Tube!!!

(sadly, some of the transfer to video isn’t great, but considering many of the films mentioned aren’t either…)

Rather than putting a whole film on my You Tube link, I’m putting it here.  I’m in serious need of guffaws!  I’d suggest full screen viewing.

 

Klansmen

I vowed to myself when I began blogging to never promote intolerance or hate (except of those who wish to destroy our individual rights, way-of-life or Constitutional Republic!)

However, TODAY, I’m promoting the KLAN!

Specifically, THIS faction…

Gay black Jewish KlansmenBecause, after all, what’s right is right!

h/t Peter, Lenny Bruce

Weapon Retention

Jay G of MArooned tells us about the following…

Arizona police officer loses handgun during chase

The Tucson Police Department says one of its guns is missing.

Police say an officer who helped locate a purse-snatching and shoplifting suspect following a foot chase on the city’s west side Monday discovered that his service weapon had been dislodged from his holster.

I’m so old, I remember when LAPD had those nifty S&W 6″ Combat Masterpieces in a duty rig which were of clamshella clamshell design!  One placed one’s finger in the trigger guard (!), depressed a button, and the holster flew open, leaving the K-Frame revolver in your hand – finger on the trigger!

Of course, mechanical contrivances being as they are, more than one revolver was lost by a patrolman scurrying over a wall whilst in foot pursuit and inadvertently depressing the release button!  Weapon retention eventually evolved into high-ride duty holsters with steel linings, thumb snaps and specific presentation angles,  said holster being held in place on the Sam Browne belt by Chicago (tension) screws.

And, Aikido – Jiu Jitsu – like training simultaneously developed to teach officers how to maintain control and possession of their weapons during physical encounters with suspects interested in obtaining their own control.

Civilian training?  SOME is out there.  Of course, making certain no miscreant even sees you have a gun until it’s leveled at him is a good idea, too.

I do remember one time when I was a security guard/graveyard shift in an urgent care facility, when an accident victim and his entourage arrived.  They were all drunk.

And I was escorting them to the even more crowded clinic when I felt a firm tug on my sidearm!  Reflexively, I used my elbow to pin the hand to the stocks, and rapidly turned and stepped away, to break the offending wrist or hand.  The guy yelled, let go and complained I’d tried to hurt him.  Then he explained he “just wanted to see what I had”!  He was drunk, of course.  I kept my cool and told him forcefully if he wanted to stay in the clinic with his friend he’d keep his hands to himself.  He complied.

I’ve never had any problem of this nature carrying concealed.  Perhaps there’s a message here?

I can’t speak for you, but, I’m no Bruce Lee.

Hell, I’m not even Pinky Lee!

pinky(Yes.  I know.  I’m old…)

RETAIN AND CONTROL YOUR WEAPONS AND ACCESS, PEOPLE!

How A Bill Becomes A Drill, Parts One and Two

Not THIS Bill!

Not THIS Bill!

Courtesy of pistol-training.com

One of the ‘quaint’ training drills of yore is the Bill Drill. 

Back in the dark ages when I was a serious IPSC competitor (once on the gold team and twice on the silver team) Robbie and Brian shot WC pistols and we all got together quite a bit for serious practice sessions. On one of these sessions I suggested a drill to work on front sight tracking during recoil and Robbie being the “funny man” he usually is coined the term “Bill Drill” and it has obviously stuck. Keep in mind this was the early 80s and we were all top level IPSC competitors shooting state of the art race guns/gear for the day. At the time we were all shooting .38 super comp guns out of Safariland holsters (we were all on team Safariland).

What it is:

1 IPSC Item target 7 yds downrange
Start position: Facing target, surrender hand position
Drill: Draw and fire 6 shots
Object: All “A” hits in under 2 seconds, if you get a shot out of the A zone the run doesn’t count

Remember this was top shooters using race gear. I personally can’t do a sub 2 second run with a real carry gun from a honest carry holster, more like 2.6 sec would be the norm.  (Bill Wilson, pistol-forum.com)

Seems Mr. Wilson has developed an evolution of the ‘Bill Drill’.  As follows:

Bill Drill 2

designed by Bill Wilson 

Range: 7 yd
Target: standard IDPA target 8″ -0 zone
Start position: gun in holster, hands at sides
Rounds fired: 15

This is a new version of the classic Bill Drill developed by Bill Wilson with a goal toward working the draw and different numbers of shots on target. Scoring is standard Vickers with a half second penalty per point down.

There are five strings of fire, each for time:

  1. Draw and fire 1 shot.
  2. Draw and fire 2 shots.
  3. Draw and fire 3 shots.
  4. Draw and fire 4 shots.
  5. Draw and fire 5 shots.

Bill Wilson suggests a 10-second total score as a goal.

Gotta love the old-timers teaching the young turks a trick or two!

(I, of course, usually did the Bill Drill #1 with a 3″  .357.  IF I strived (strove?) for ‘A’ hits – Well, let me explain it this way:  When Robbie was shooting in the same competition (we were NOT in the same class!) by the time I drew, shot, and reholstered, he’d driven home, changed into his jammies, popped some popcorn and was watching Miami Vice…:-)  )

Hard To Believe – It’s Been NINETEEN YEARS…

Yesterday was the anniversary of the accident.

2014-03-19 07.32.29Nineteen years ago, today, her life support was turned off.

Had she lived, she would be 31.  Instead, she is permanently 12.

She was a terrific kid, blossoming into a terrific young woman.  Smart, funny, aware, and a good citizen.

I love you and miss you Molly.

.   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .  .

IF YOU TAKE NOTHING ELSE FROM TODAY’S POST, GO AND HUG AND KISS THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE, AND TELL THEM YOU LOVE THEM.

BECAUSE YOU NEVER KNOW…

(and no place for comments today – you’ve all been kind enough, thank you! - Guffaw)

Leather Dreams

So, I’m working in a large Costco-style store, just to the right of the main door, where people usually walk by to the 55 gallon drums of Cheetos, SELLING HOLSTERS!

And they are displayed much like at the big gun shows, on heavy vertical frames consisting of black wire rectangles.  And, not being used to standing on my feet any longer, I’m taking a break, on the nearby park bench (?) within earshot of the holster sales area.

And two of my co-workers are alleged to be covering for me.

A customer appears, resembling one of the Orange Gunsite instructors I know, a retired AZDPS guy.  He’s looking at the holsters, in particular a soft tan chamois number, with multiple belt snaps, including one right in the middle of the top(?)

It’s made by Bianchi (say BEE-YANKEE) and resembles a rough-out leather 5-cigar case with snaps and straps at one end.  I’ve no idea what model of pistol it is for.

And my relievers are no where to be found – and I’m tired and in pain.

But, duty calls, and I go to the customer just before he leaves, miffed.

And he explains he usually just cuts off the weird center strap, for no particular reason.

THEN I WAKE UP!

I swear, I only had ONE 12 year old single-malt Scotch last night!  (with, of course, two squares of dark chocolate) !  What’s up with this dream?

FTC – this was just a dream.  Neither Costco or Bianchi gave me anything!  And I bought the Scotch and chocolate myself – with help from a friend!)

The (Former) State of The State

NOT The State of The Union…

David Hardy (Gun Rights Attorney extraordinaire – who lives in AZ!) reminds us of the Days of Yore…

From the Journal of the (Arizona) House of Representatives, 1933, p.167:

At 10:21 AM, the Sergeant-at-Arms announced His Excellency the Governor of Arizona, who addressed the legislature as follows:

“Mr. Speaker, Gentlemen of the Senate, House, and citizens of the State of Arizona:

I am not here this morning with a .45-90, or any malice of any kind in my heart….”

Can you imagine if a current governor (or President) addressed a legislature in such a manner, today?

When A Politician Becomes An Elder Statesman

(Stolen from Pitsnipe Gripes…)

The Story Of What Happens When A Politician Dies..

While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies.His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.
“Welcome to heaven,” says St. Peter. “Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we’re not sure what to do with you.”
“No problem, just let me in,” says the man.
“Well, I’d like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we’ll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity.”
“Really, I’ve made up my mind. I want to be in heaven,” says the senator.
“I’m sorry, but we have our rules.”
And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.
Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people.
They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne.
Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before he realizes it, it is time to go.
Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises…
The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter
is waiting for him.
“Now it’s time to visit heaven.”
So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.
“Well, then, you’ve spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity.”
The senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: “Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell.”
So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.
Now the doors of the elevator open and he’s in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage.
He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above.
The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder. “I don’t understand,” stammers the senator. “Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there’s just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?”
The devil looks at him, smiles and says,
“Yesterday we were campaigning…… Today you voted.”
Shamelessly stolen from Mike over at Ninety miles from tyranny
"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas - how he got in my pajamas I dunno!" - Groucho Marx as Captain Spaulding in Animal Crackers

This election is not about who gets voted off the island.
It’s about who is at the tiller of this Republic’s Ship of State. - Guffaw

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The Four Rules

1. ALL GUNS ARE ALWAYS LOADED.

2. NEVER POINT YOUR MUZZLE AT SOMETHING YOU ARE NOT WILLING TO DESTROY.

3. KEEP YOUR FINGER OFF THE TRIGGER UNTIL YOUR SIGHTS ARE ON THE TARGET AND YOU ARE READY TO SHOOT.

4. KNOW YOUR TARGET AND WHAT'S BEYOND.

Certified EVIL!

FEAR

"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain." - Bene Gesserit, from Frank Herbert's Dune

Penn Jillette

“F**k Civility. Hyperbole, passion, and metaphor are beautiful parts of rhetoric. The marketplace of ideas cannot be toned down for the insane.” - Penn Jillette

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