archives

not guns

This category contains 90 posts

Los Dos Ascos

I like certain Mexican food dishes.  Being a somewhat picky (American) food eater, like art, I know what I like.  I’m even pickier with ethnic food.

J. has been pining to revisit a Mexican food place of yore – one she went to years ago, and one of her clients has been recently raving about.

chipsLos Dos Molinos

(Locals may note I’m NOT linking to them!)

We opted to go the other afternoon.  There are four locations – we went to the one she visited over 10 years ago.  In a less-than-good part of town, it’s ‘colorful’, like a dive bar is colorful.

We went in anyway.

Yep.  Dive (Mexican) bar restaurant chic.

It took them forever after they seated us to get us menus.  Both of us being fans of Margaritas, and the restaurant lauding many varieties and ‘authenticity’, we opted for a pitcher of the house Marg.

THE WORST MARGARITA EVER!

Picture lime flavored Crystal Light, iced to dilution, with enough cheap tequila to give you a cheap buzz.  $21.00 a pitcher!!!  Not worth $3.00.

Our entrees were also poor.  J.’s machaca chimichanga I’m told was tasteless – my chimi was quite spicy (in keeping with the New Mexican Mexican vibe), but soggy.  At least hers was crisp.

We complained to the waitress/bartender, who at least didn’t charge us for the pitcher.

We like to support local business when we can afford to.

We’ll not be returning here.

More INTRIGUE!

olds

not my car, same color

…well, more problems with my 2000 Oldsmobile Intrigue!

I was running an important errand for roommate J. evening last (well, going to a soft ice cream emporium for pumpkin pie blizzards appropriately healthy treats!), when I noticed the car was running kinda doggy.  And the battery light on the dash lit up – as did some other miscellaneous lights.  And even seeing the lit dashboard was becoming a challenge…!

All this while in line at the DQ!

Fortunately (or perhaps, unfortunately) this is about 1/4 mile South of our residence.

So I limped her home in the dark, lights and engine in various states of fail, praying for her not to die in the street.  And for no constables to be patrolling nearby.  And my prayers were answered!

Kinda…

I was able to coax her to just outside our respective marked covered parking spaces.  Emphasis on the just.

And there she died.

I attempted to physically push her into my space, being the fat cripple I am, and failed miserably.  And the area directly behind the parking spaces is a private drive – a road – wherein traffic has been known to travel.  So I couldn’t just leave her there!  The H.O.A. would have her towed probably before my key hit my lock.

So, I called J., my roommate, landlady, and friend, who was lounging inside awaiting her Blizzard healthy snack.  Thank the gods for cellular telephones.

She responded tuit suite, and together we pushed my Intrigue into my space.  Again kinda.

She’s difficult to maneuver with no power steering, and two persons-of-our-vintage with various physical issues don’t help much, either.  J. had to retreat because of her asthma and move HER car to a different space so mine can sit comfortably – albeit diagonally – across our two allotted spaces.

Next, the problem of diagnosing what exactly is wrong, and coming up with the money to fix her.

SIGH – it’s always something!

At least she’s not on the street!  :-)

AND, about an hour later, there was enough juice to close the driver’s window and secure the vehicle!  HUZZAH!

Pahk Ya Cah? Can’t! They’ll be BLOOD IN THE STREETS!

(from JayG, in part)

More great news from the land I escaped…

Boston Puts Brakes On Haystack Parking App

A new app that allows people to find parking spaces in Boston is being shut down in response to a vote by the city council.

A new ordinance outlaws services that allow people to sell or save public parking spaces.

Got that? The app helped people find parking spaces, so what was the response from Boston? BAN IT. Smell that? It smells like Massachusetts. It gets better, though:

“They are dealing in hypotheticals. We’ve had no reported issues. We’ve heard this rhetoric, ‘There’s going to be blood in the streets,’ and that hasn’t happened. We’ve had over 1,000 successful transactions, and we haven’t seen any of that.”

Ah, yes, blood in the streets. We’ve never heard that prediction before. Ever. And even if we had, it certainly came true, right?

Of course, he’s referring to more citizens owning legal firearms.  And they have, and the whole blood thing hasn’t materialized.

And violent crime has dropped where gun ownership has increased.

Even in places like Chicago and Detroit!

Personally, I believe governments should think long and hard before banning anything in a ‘free’ country. – Guffaw

Out of the Dojo into the Real World

(courtesy of my friend Borepatch)

Out of the Dojo into the Real World

One of the members of our dojo used the skills he’s been practicing for years. It happened suddenly. It happened in his back yard while his wife was outside doing yard work. A car being chased by the police hit a fire hydrant on the corner of their street and the driver bailed out running.Steven looked out the window at the sound of the crash, saw the guy coming at a run into the yard, and went outside. I don’t know if the man was just trying to run past them, but Steven reacted to the perceived threat to his family. The link calls it a tackle. Heh.No one was hurt, the police were already on the way, the man was cuffed in less than a minute after he was pinned. The suspect has a criminal record stretching back 15 years.

I had been waiting hoping the TV station would post the whole interview, but all the link has is the text of the news article and the 45 second teaser.

The learnings that were shared with me:

1. It unfolded very fast.
2. There was not a lot of thinking.
3. People that don’t practice falling don’t fall well.
4. The expanded awareness and sense of calm only seemed remarkable after the fact.
5. And I quote, “Aikido works!” (the first words he said to me when he told me about it)

GREAT STUFF!
But, I was reminded of two things:
1)  Bruce Lee (when asked to invade a bad guy’s lair, unarmed) said, “Why don’t your just take a .45 and blast him?”  (Enter The Dragon)
2)  Posse Comitatus – a cop orders a passer-by to ‘stop’ a fugitive (meaning to tackle or trip him) and the guy pulls a gun and blasts him!
It’s good our Aikido practitioner was alert, but might have been better had he been armed.
Just in case (?)

A Firm, Dry Handshake

My own Father was not a hugger (of other men).  Perhaps it was his generation (b. 1916), or time in history.  But for him, a firm handshake said it all.  A man’s word is his bond was often something implied in the handshake.  Whether the word meant agreement to an implied contract (Yes, I will clean up my room), welcome (Welcome home, son, good to see you!), or even LOVE. (no verbal statement made)

As a result, when it comes to interaction with other men, I welcome a firm, dry handshake – as described numerous times in Ian Fleming’s James Bond novels.  Not simply gripping the others hand with the tips of the fingers and thumb, but full engagement – thumb crotch to thumb crotch (or whatever they’re called).  Not the (again, intoning Mr. Fleming) slimy, wet, limp grip of the Middle East, which makes a man want to wipe his hand on his coat tails, either.

It has come to pass that scientists have determined over-use of soaps, antibacterial hand cleaners and sanitizers have weakened our respective immune systems.  In the effort to ‘keep clean’, we have invited more resistant microbes into the mix.

And now, scientists (I wonder if they are the same ones?) have determined the following:

Fist bumps ‘cleaner than handshakes’ (!)

I remember when I first saw the ‘fist bump’, as part of a ‘cool’ ritual of Black youth.  Instead of shaking hands (as the White Devil slavemasters had done) they ‘checked in’, sometimes additionally bumping forearms and even hips!

I thought it was well, stupid then, and my opinion hasn’t changed.

Then, a popular comedian and game-show host began fist-bumping.  He said it was because of his aversion to spreading or receiving bacteria. (I wonder if he kisses or has other personal contact with women?)

NOW, such behavior is reaching the mainstream (as shown in the news item, above).

I can see not wanting to shake hands with someone who is openly infectiously diseased.  That’s just prudent.  But fist-bumping like a hipster is just silly.

I know, I’ll probably die younger because of it.

But, my word remains my bond, and I’ve no other way I can comfortably express that.

And, I like hugging and kissing women, too!  :-)

Must be generational.

DOGCON 1

2014-04-03 15.17.23

Lola

The littlest of the three chee-hooa-hooas, Lola, is now six months old, and has grown from under two pounds four months ago, to a powerhouse of almost SIX pounds!  :-)

She successfully survived her hysterectomy (with a barely visible scar) and now is content terrorizing the large boy dog (DJ), who is probably 15-20 pounds.  Yes, he’s a throwback, every genetic trait one doesn’t ask for in a chihuahua.  Including massive size.

2013-04-13 12.23.43-3

DJ

But, he’s a big, stupid, happy lummox and we love him.

Lola is VERY bright.  Try to lure her into a trap (like her kennel for the night) and she’ll fall for the bait.  Exactly ONCE.  And never again.

She also has an Early Warning System, if she’s penned up and wants out to ‘do her business’.  We didn’t train her to do this – she trained us.

I’m usually awake around 0600-0700.  Shower, dress, morning stuff and blog.  And when the mistress-of-the-manor is absent, Lola bivoacs in MY room.

A Sample Morning

0600 – I Awaken.  Kissed by a tiny dog who has been watching me wake up, who then curls up in my armpit and snuggles back to sleep.  Then she produces 61,000 btus, forcing me to arise.  (Well, that and my impatient bladder!)

0605 – Shower.  Lola must be kenneled, lest she join me in the shower.  She doesn’t require a bath daily.  I do.  Besides, I might accidentally step on her!

0615 – Dress.  Lola remains kenneled, half or completely asleep, or sometimes therein quietly watching me check my email and blog.

UNLESS, NATURE CALLS HER!

Me, sitting at the computer, tiny kennel on the adjacent bed, containing tiny dog.  All is quiet, except occasional keystrokes and the ever-present fan.  (This IS AZ, after all!)

Suddenly there is a tiny, tiny bark.  Not particularly high-pitched, but very slight in volume, as if distant outside.  Usually no response from me.  (We designate this DOGCON 3)

Then, a slightly louder bark, perhaps 20 seconds later.  This is obviously from inside the house; inside my room.  More apparent urgency (DOGCON 2)

(Followed by, if I choose to ignore it…)

DOGCON 1a loud, piecing, deafening bark, threatening immediate negative consequences unless she is allowed paper access IMMEDIATELY!  This usually also agitates my chronic tinnitus!

My usual response is to get up from my desk, open the kennel, and she jumps up to my chest, sometimes my shoulder – and I carry her to the bathroom, containing the all-important morning paper.

And all is shortly right with the World!

(Until the tiny kitten Belle is heard screaming outside the bedroom door to be included in the blog process (aka walking willy-nilly across the keyboard).  Please note, I usually learn from this and ignore her!)

We Need A (Data) Doctor Here!

(Obviously, an epidemic of hard drive crashes!)

Reading From the Same Playbook

hard drivesNow the EPA has also lost emails due to hard drive crashes?

GEE, I wonder if I told the IRS MY tax records were lost due to a bad hard drive?

fuggetaboutit

 

h/t Larry

“It’s Never As Easy As It Looks!”

When I was a P.I., working the Bob H. at T.E. & A (enough initials for you?), I remember getting cases that had little information with which to start, but soon, all fell into place.  And others that appeared to be a slam dunk, only to get mired in something complex and nerve-wracking.

I remember sharing my observations about all this with Bob, and he responded, “It’s never as easy as it looks.”  I told him we should have a sign over the squad room with that very saying.

Fast-forward from 1981 ’til today.  Here I am, post car repair.  My 2000 Olds Intrigue has been rapidly deteriorating over the past couple of months, in need of new front brakes and some-kind of engine-repair, minimally, just to keep her road worthy and safe.  (She also needs two tires, and A/C repair, but, those will have to wait. :-(  )

I just don’t have the funds.  I live paycheck-to-paycheck on my disability.

My dear roommate offered to front me some funds to get the necessary repairs done!  We got the car into a local garage of good reputation, and waited.  Turned out the engine problems were the result of the old ignition switch failing.  We opted for the generic switch over the factory ($300 difference!) and this gives me one key for the door, a second for the ignition.  No big deal, right?

Well, not exactly.  These are not your grandfather’s ignition switches.  Seems they are having difficulty getting the security of the key to match the security programmed into the car.  Or something.

It’s never as easy as it looks!  And all this to make a 15 year old beater drivable again.

Sigh.

(Update – I got my car back, ignition switch now working, and engine running better than before, but not like new.  The brakes have been replaced, but the dashboard brake light comes on after about 20 brakings and stays on until the car sits for about 20 minutes(!)  Of course, it’s SUNDAY, and the earliest I can get back to the garage is Tuesday.)

It IS never as easy as it looks!

:-(

(Update Two – I bought two ‘gently used’ tired for the front, as the ones I had were paper thin.  Good news – they hold air, and are balanced!  Bad news – my right front wheel has two partly stripped lugs.  So I’m running on four instead of six.  It’s always something.)

(Update Three – my SESservice engine soon – light went on when I dared drive FIVE miles, yesterday!)

Big Changes Here @ Rancho Malario

“Here’s a line of peasants leaving Rancho Malario, to make room for YOU!”  (from the Firesign Theatre, having little to do with the following post…  NO, where I live is NOT Rancho Malario!)

Well, my lovely roomie has decided to move her unfinished, unrestored, ’62 Chevrolet Corvair Wagon to it’s proper place in the resident’s storage lot immediately West of our townhouse!  (I’m certain complaints about it being an eyesore to the HOA from anonymous, whining neighbors had nothing to do with her decision.)  Her dream was to have it fully restored to cosmetic and drivable condition, but, unfortunately, financial considerations got in the way.

20140611_142437(This was a car she and her last husband acquired and drove together in the 90’s, before his untimely demise in an industrial accident.  As such, it’s a proper memory of him, and represents why she hasn’t just sold it to some collector.)

This means I’m able to move my recently-made-drivable 2000 Oldsmobile Intrigue to the second spot under the resident’s covered parking, and out of the direct sunlight!  In most regions, this would be no big deal, but in the sunny Valley-Of-The-Sun (temperature today 105) this is a BIG DEAL!

Especially as while drivable, the Olds remains un-airconditioned, so every little bit helps!

In other news, my roomie is leaving today for her sister’s in California for a well-deserved vacation and to conduct some family business.  This means once again, I am the Dog (and Cat) Wrangler! – now with Puppy!

Not a problem, as they love me and I them, and this gives us a break from each other.

AND I GET TO PARK IN THE SHADE – WOO-HOO!

Wrongway Corrigan Redux

There seems to be a plethora of local news stories of late regarding persons driving the wrong way down local highways and impacting other right-driving persons, sometimes fatally. (Phoenix area)

PHOENIX — Three fatal head-on collisions caused by wrong-way drivers in the last week have caused Arizona law enforcement and transportation officials to hold an emergency meeting Sunday on how to deal with the problem.

The latest fatal collision occurred early Sunday morning when two people were killed after their car was struck by a wrong-way driver on the Santan Freeway in Gilbert, Arizona Department of Public Safety officials said.

The fatal crash is the third head-on collision caused by a wrong-way driver in six days that have claimed the lives of seven people — including an off-duty police officer  (USA Today)

It came out that alcohol was involved in one of the crashes, and hasn’t yet been ruled out in the others.

WTF?

And now, with State-legal medical marijuana paving the way for general legalization…?  Don’t give me that “I’ve never known anyone on weed to drive poorly” speech.  I’ve seen them and I’ve known them.  Impairment is impairment.

And if they still don’t enforce the DUI/DWI laws for alcohol (because, you know EVERYONE drives after 3 or 4 drinks, especially politicians), what happens next?

At least Wrong Way Corrigan was skilled and never killed anyone!

(This doesn’t mean I’m against alcohol and marijuana use.  It means if you are impaired – don’t drive.  With this holiday weekend looming I thought this was a good thing to mention.  Because Memorial Day is all about partying, right?  :-( )

 

"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas - how he got in my pajamas I dunno!" - Groucho Marx as Captain Spaulding in Animal Crackers

This election is not about who gets voted off the island.
It’s about who is at the tiller of this Republic’s Ship of State. - Guffaw

THE NOW SHAMELESS BLOGGER’S SURVIVAL FUND

Email

guffaw1952 (at) hotmail (dot) com

What ‘They’ Are Saying About Guffaw…

"Guffaw is 'controversial' " - Vietnam-era Green Beret 'Doc'

"One of my favorites, I love the old P.I. stories. They have a nice Mickey Spillane feel to them." - Siddhartha

"...an avid arms man." - Natalie

"Old Private Investigator Entertainment. OPIE" :-D - North

Liebster Blog Award

x 4 ! Thank you North, Tango Juliet, ProudHillbilly and Fill Yer Hands!

Profiles in Curry

The Book of Barkley

American Flag

Gibson

I Stand With Gibson!

Browncoat

Judy’s Salon

jatjfy (at) live (dot) com (480) 529-6133

Proud Blogfather of

Quizikle

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 317 other followers

The Four Rules

1. ALL GUNS ARE ALWAYS LOADED.

2. NEVER POINT YOUR MUZZLE AT SOMETHING YOU ARE NOT WILLING TO DESTROY.

3. KEEP YOUR FINGER OFF THE TRIGGER UNTIL YOUR SIGHTS ARE ON THE TARGET AND YOU ARE READY TO SHOOT.

4. KNOW YOUR TARGET AND WHAT'S BEYOND.

Certified EVIL!

FEAR

"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain." - Bene Gesserit, from Frank Herbert's Dune

Penn Jillette

“F**k Civility. Hyperbole, passion, and metaphor are beautiful parts of rhetoric. The marketplace of ideas cannot be toned down for the insane.” - Penn Jillette

Blog Stats

  • 154,266 hits

+ blog stats from the PREVIOUS Guffaw in AZ blog…

109,419

Copyright Notice

All original content on this web site is copyright (c) on date of publication by this author. All rights reserved, except that others may quote from the original content under the 'Fair Use' provisions of U.S. copyright law.

Financial Disclosure

I'm currently on disability, unable to work, and receive marginal benefits. I've been advised by SSDI I may receive some additional income. Based on their statements, I'm adding a bleg to this blog. Effective 03/06/2012. Thank you for your kindness.

In Loving Memory…

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 317 other followers