When I started this blog, it was more just an outlet – it was something to do. Being on medical disability for lymphoma, compounded by arthritis, a fused hip, and diabetes, I told myself I would NOT use the blog as therapy.
Even though, on more than one occasion, I have! :-)
But one advantage of this window on the world is it can be indeed a window. And can be observed both directions.
Recently, I posted about Kilted To Kick Cancer. Cancer charities are especially personal to me, being a lymphoma survivor, and all. When I was diagnosed, and required chemotherapy, I was actively employed and had quality health insurance.
But, it wasn’t enough to cover the high cost of the chemo.
Enter a charity – who, upon my application, covered the bulk of the cost not absorbed by my insurance.
For this, and for many things, I should be grateful.
But, I get into myself, ongoing chronic pain issues, inability to work, low income, old bad car w/o A/C, yatta, yatta, yatta…
Then I get a view into the window!
I’m privileged to have many people follow me on this blog. I’ve no idea why they do. And while some are fellow travelers of the libertarian/conservative/gun totin’ kind, there are others.
Talk about an attitude adjustment! To see what this beautiful woman and her family are going through…
And so many others.
Some of you may recognize the post title as the theme song to the film and TV show M.A.S.H. It’s ironic.
It’s obvious from the outpouring of emotion that the recent suicide of actor/comedian Robin Williams touched many people. And caused THEM pain.
As a libertarian, I believe I’ve the right to do with my own body as I wish. You do, too. As long as it doesn’t affect other people negatively.
And there’s the rub.
I can eat more than is healthy, eat the ‘wrong’ foods, smoke or drink if I wish, watch ‘questionable’ videos, read unsavory material, and most of this doesn’t directly affect my family, friends, or former coworkers.
But, what if I choose to do something permanent…?
Why is it it appears the more artistic of us are the most tortured? Or is that a misconception based on the fact famous people get the media attention?
When I heard about Robin Williams, my first thought was he has children. And based on that fact alone, he should not have taken this path.
And then I thought of Ernest Hemingway, another artistic person with issues who ended his own life. And Vincent Van Gogh. And so many others.
If you have such issues, please get help! Know that there are people out there who care. And that the World would be lacking without you.
h/t The Actor’s Studio
American Mercenary recent wrote regarding the loss of a formerly close Internet friend, or two.
As I’ve been musing about the subject of ‘friends’ he got my attention.
It seems I thought for some time that if one has a friend, one has that friend for life. The concept of ‘unfriending’ someone with whom you have a disagreement seemed a foreign concept. I held my friends close.
In my mind.
But, I was wrong in my belief. I needed to hold my friends, not in my mind, but in my heart.
Over the years, I’ve lost many friends, usually through attrition. Someone moves into a different social circle, or geographic region. Or changes jobs. And the contacts are broken. Stuff happens.
But it’s only been in recent years that I’ve begun to recognize my actions have taken their toll. Taking advantage, contacting them only when it was advantageous to me. Not holding up my half of the friendship. Not being a friend.
Essentially, being an a$$40le!
And this has cost me, dearly. At least three close friends in the past 15 years. And, this doesn’t even include the other losses. Like Mark Bell, who passed away suddenly. Or special friends – lovers.
I’ve atoned for my sins, but that’s not enough. I need to continue to be a friend to my friends. Lest I lose any more.
If you read this blog, you know I always ask you to tell your children and loved ones how you feel. Include your friends. Because you never know.
Learn from my errors – cherish your friends, now.
My roomie recently made an impulse buy at our local gun store. A Double Tap derringer. In .45 ACP!
(from their website) DoubleTap Firearms has developed the world’s smallest and lightest .45 ACP concealed carry pistol on the market today. Also available in 9mm.
|Titanium or Aluminium Frames with a MIL-STD finish that resists corrosion|
|Stainless Steel Barrels|
|Two rounds in the chamber and integral grips house an additional two spare rounds|
|Optional Ported barrels reduces muzzle flip and recoil|
|Small, slim, no-snag hammerless design for easy pocket carry|
|Ambidextrous thumb latch to eject spent rounds|
|U.S. Patent No. D686685 and other Patents Pending|
RE: Double Action Trigger – She (WE) have not shot her yet, but as it’s 14 oz. and a 1911 is traditionally 39, I suspect it comes-back-a-bit. (Roomie did not get the comped barrels!) Her trigger is a long, crunchy pull, which is her only ‘safety’. If one has the time, I believe the proper way to activate the trigger is by stacking or staging.
That is pulling smoothly until the double-action mechanism takes up slack, then holding and gaining a sight-picture before touching her off.
Even the manufacturer’s own literature says she is NOT a target or competition piece. I suspect, like the classic Derringer, she’s a ‘put into a gut or orifice and empty’ kind of firearm.
She does come with a clip – a speed strip kind of device holding an additional 6 rounds. And a two-rounder stored neatly in the butt of the weapon.
Now, if it is only
(I will post an AAR after we field test her.)
attn FTC – she bought it, okay?
Guffaw’s got the blues…
I try not to let the state of
the World the Nation my life get to me. I try not to be self-centered. I do realize that there’s very little I can do regarding the state of either the World or the Nation. I’ve let my opinions be known, and I voted. I’ve spoken out on this blog. In many places on the globe these things are not allowed, and subject to sever penalties.
But, I can do something about my attitude! I’m approaching a landmark anniversary in my life (if you reckon in Base 10); I’ve no partner to share it with; no money – on disability (which is both a description of lack of funds and physical ability).
I’ve a number of chronic conditions, and seem to acquire more every day. I owe medical bills.
I drive a 13 year old car, when I can afford gasoline.
And last Summer, because my disability income is 60% lower than my previous meager income, I lost my home. (“We lived in a hallway!” “We dreamed of living in a hallway-we lived in a cardboard box!” – Monty Python) Fortunately, a good friend offered me a place to stay.
Two weeks ago, my sister had a minor stroke. (If there is such a thing). She’s back to work, and coping, but it does get one’s attention.
But all is not lost.
Re: this upcoming calendar mark – My new neighbor and EX-wife (and friend) contacted me, and asked if she could put a little celebration together in my honor!
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, “If you have friends, you have everything!” You know, like the end of that Christmas movie…
Time to remove my head from it’s regular inverted resting place and get moving.
Thanks for listening.
…and even the lowly like me!
Being a disabled individual most of my life, I’m usually pretty careful about falling. I have fallen a few times in the past ten years, usually by catching the edge of a kerb with my shoe by not picking up my leg far enough. Last year, having had additional issues, I purchased a shoe lift for my right leg, making up the missing height with a taller sole and heel. Except for my fused hip, I can walk almost normally with this shoe. No walking on the toe or shoulders dropping with my gait.
But, there are occasional problems.
Yesterday, I became a bit miffed with myself. I moved June 30, but haven’t yet found places for many boxes, cannot get into my closet and am missing many items. So I did some work to remedy this. Or so I thought.
Mid-afternoon, after emptying some boxes, I was repositioning a floor lamp to get better lighting in my room, and promptly tripped on the extension cord with Ed (aka the Really Big Shoe)*. I fell face-first into the space between my barrister bookcase and my dresser, tweaking my lower back, hitting the edge of the bookcase with my face, bruising my chest, and scraping my right wrist. My eyeglasses also were reconformed into a modern art piece. Getting up from almost prone has always been a challenge, and was now more so with the various added injuries. But we prevailed.
My roomie returned from work and fretted over me, and took me out for beer. A little alcoholic anesthetic helped, but wasn’t a cure.
At least I didn’t damage the furniture, and no arteries were severed; no bones broken; joints sprained. I was able to plier-cobble my eyeglasses back into shape. I do have a cut on my right cheek and two bruises on my chest. It’s been suggested I make up a fight story.
Naw, just an old guy stumbling.*for the youngsters, a reference to TV variety show host Ed Sullivan, who often proclaimed he has a really big show for us, but pronounced show as shoe.
Most firearms and film aficionados will recognize the quote snippet above. For the uninitiated, it’s Clint Eastwood as Inspector ‘Dirty’ Harry Callahan. Spoken while pointing his 6″ Smith & Wesson model 29 .44 magnum at a wounded bank robbery suspect’s head. One of his more (in)famous tag lines.
The Smith & Wesson was developed in the 1950s as a hunting handgun. Knowledgeable gun folks understood it was too heavy and bulky to carry for self-protection. And the full-house rounds was well, stout, when shooting.
But, like many folks who came-of-age in the 60’s and 70’s, the iconic Dirty Harry gun had large appeal. Just like the Walther PPK of James Bond fame – only MUCH larger!
And, there was a small window in my life where I had the funds to acquire one. I was ‘smart’ enough to have the 4″ barrel. And stainless. It was concealable – or more so than the 6″. But still big and heavy.
It was the first gun I carried after the State issued me a permit for doing so. At the mall, just because. Kind of a field test. No one saw anything.
But, as with carrying any full-size or service sidearm, it was heavy. And somewhat difficult to conceal – even for a big guy like me. Soon, I evolved into carrying a full sized 1911, or a electroless-nickeled S&W 442 for ‘light days’. And the .44 was returned to the safe.
I did take her shooting a few times to show off. Mostly with new students. Very accurate, coupled with much blast and flash. And recoil.
And this is my point. I found out a while back that many Gunsite-taught folks have changed over to 9mm, instead of the ubiquitous .45 ACP, because they are less painful to shoot!
Could age and infirmity be driving our choices over stopping power? It certain did over my 629 Smith. So you gotta ask yourself one question:
Do you feel lucky?
I’ve a tendency to whine. I’ve matured over the years, and whine less, but, when I do, it’s a fine full-bodied, aged, whine! (I think I’ve complained about this before, but, it warrants additional complaining!)
Since I’ve been able to receive medical care, I’ve been seeing my physician every three months. And she has prescribed for me five medications. Of course, these need reauthorization by her every couple of months.
And there’s the rub.
It seems every month, my physician and my pharmacy cannot get it together. Some months it’s one scrip that need reauthorization, some months four or five. And it is as if the pharmacy speaks Tagalog and the doctor’s office Farsi, and never the twain shall meet.
EVERY MONTH I get to wrestle with the two of them telephonically, until the missing med is reauthorized. This most current event began last Thursday, when I called my prescription requests to the pharmacy. I was able to pick up all but one med on Monday. Still awaiting one permission. And two of the drugs I collected had needed reauthorization(!) WTF?
And, my doctor won’t authorize the 90 day prescriptions – guess she wants to keep closer tabs on me. I’m scheduled for another visit this month.
Two of the medications are blood pressure related. I wonder if I’d only need one, if someone simply did their job!
My previous doctor and pharmacy seemed to work in concert with one another. Of course, they were more expensive.
I’m still awaiting confirmation the scrip has been ordered. Sigh.
Update – after over an hour on the telephone with both the doctor’s office and the pharmacy, they told me they would transfer me to my doctor’s medical assistant (who was given the message yesterday) to get this resolved.
It went to her voice mail!!
One of the challenges is that there are two of us, and the project is physically taxing. My ‘partner-in-crime’ called me this morning, after yesterday’s work, to explain she doesn’t feel well and is tired and sore, and needs to rest today.
Of course I was disappointed. I was dressed, rarin’ to go and almost out the door when she called.
The other feeling I felt was gratitude. While I’m anxious to complete this project (there IS a time limit), I felt relief. When I told her the other day ‘We’re not 20, anymore!’, she responded ‘Hell, we’re not 40, anymore!’
And, of course, she’s right. And she’s right in line with my Internet friends who know of the project, and intone me to ‘take care of myself’. I’m tired and sore, as well.
SO, I AM taking care of myself, AND, learning (yet again) Patience and Acceptance.
h/t Judy, with thanks!
wilsonblog links to HomePlace – Art’s Stuff sharing with us yet another (preventable) tale of woe.
1. ALL GUNS ARE ALWAYS LOADED.
2. NEVER POINT YOUR MUZZLE AT SOMETHING YOU ARE NOT WILLING TO DESTROY.
3. KEEP YOUR FINGER OFF THE TRIGGER UNTIL YOUR SIGHTS ARE ON THE TARGET AND YOU ARE READY TO SHOOT.
4. KNOW YOUR TARGET AND WHAT’S BEYOND.
Obviously, this unidentified firearm user failed applying all four rules!
We all become
lazy lackadaisical too comfortable in our gun handling, and stuff happens.
We cannot repeat The Four Rules enough. Here is yet another reminder. Thankfully, no one was killed.