Will Rogers was a comedian and actor from the early part of the Twentieth Century. Before becoming a stage personality, he had actually been a cowboy – some of his act involved lasso tricks!
Rogers, who died in a 1935 plane crash, was one of the greatest
political sages this country has ever known.
Never slap a man
who’s chewing tobacco.
Never kick a cow
chip on a hot day.
There are two
theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.
Never miss a good
chance to shut up.
upstream from the herd.
If you find
yourself in a hole, stop digging.
The quickest way
to double your money is to fold it and put it back into your pocket.
There are three
kinds of men:
ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them
have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.
comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
If you’re riding’
ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it’s still
Lettin’ the cat
outta the bag is a whole lot easier’n puttin’ it back.
After eating an
entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring.
kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him.
moral : When you’re full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
~ Eventually you
will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about
~ The older we get,
the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
~ Some people try to
turn back their odometers. Not me; I want people to know ‘why’ I look this way.
traveled a long way, and some of the roads weren’t paved.
~ When you are
dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.
~ You know you are
getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
~ I don’t know how I
got over the hill without getting to the top.
~ One of the many
things no one tells you about aging is that it’s such a nice change from being
~ One must wait
until evening to see how splendid the day has been.
~ Being young is
beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
~ Long ago, when men
cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft.
it’s called golf.
finally ~ If you don’t learn
to laugh at trouble, you won’t have anything to laugh at when you’re old.
h/t my dear sister, Ellie